No one fantasizes about being a chronic pain psychotherapist and an advocate for moving their body when they grow up. This kind of work is a calling, based on pain and struggle. How grateful I am for my pain, for my deeply personal connection with others, and for the privilege of doing this work. It is an honor to be part of your journey.
For years, this was me, fighting chronic pain. The medical treatments, the pain, the emotions that no one seemed to understand, and no matter what, life kept moving on whether you were feeling it or not. Life was chaotic, for many years I felt defeated. So if you take anything from today, take this. Stop trying to reduce the pain. Stop running after the pain to go away because it is stressful. Do not make your goal to get rid of the pain but to change your relationship to it. Life is so different today, not because of surgery (which was extremely helpful and I would not change it) but because of how I was able to process the ups and downs, the appointments, the pain, and the overall chaotic life I had experienced. Life does not stop because you are in pain, it keeps moving and if you do not take care of yourself it will leave you behind. At the same time I was teaching myself how to avoid pain, I was also training myself to live without love. We get so caught up with what we cannot do that we forget about what we can do. It is like an addiction that becomes your coping mechanism, whether that be opioids, shopping, eating, etc. Taking care of yourself means being able to do something for yourself without overdoing it, without becoming dependent on it, and without feeling guilty.
I still have some bad days and on those days it seems a lot harder to function but my pain continues to tell me what I need. Listen to your body, your body is telling you something and chances are it is going back to a time when you did not feel safe. Trauma is not just an event that took place sometime in the past; it is also the imprint left by that experience on your mind, brain, and body. Pain arises in an environment of fear and humans are wired to believe that physical or emotional pain = damage. But just because you are in pain does not make you any less. The goal is not for the pain to go away it is for you to develop healthy habits for yourself that can help you manage your pain. Your pain is real, but what do you need? Do you need to stretch? Do you need to work on mobility? Do you need to strengthen your muscles? Do you need a doctor? Do you need to eat more vegetables? Do you need more sleep? Do you need to increase your coping mechanisms? Do you need to talk to someone? Do you need breathing techniques? You may need one or more of these but whatever it is you need, reach for it because life will not stop. Trust the process but most importantly trust yourself.
Hopefully, I have given you extra knowledge to understand the qualification differences in the mental health field and the correlation between your physical and mental health. If you desire to seek services and think I may be a good fit for you go ahead and contact me at [email protected] or 269-815-8571.
